28 October 2008

Real names that sound like a joke

My Sun

Tuesday, October 28, 2008


Cruel parents or just unlucky? ... Phil Graves is just one of the hilarious real names in new book

Cruel parents or just unlucky? ... Phil Graves is just one of the hilarious real names in new book

Real names that sound like a joke


SOME parents can be cruel – or down right stupid – when naming their kids. Other people are just born with a surname that makes you titter. Now the funniest have been collected from British records of births, marriages and deaths dating back centuries. Here TIM SPANTON picks out some of the best.

SUE AGE

Born Glasgow, 1849.

PETER PIDDLE

Baptised Fowey, Cornwall, 1649.

ENEMA BOTTOMLEY WOOD

Died Huddersfield, 1904.

SEYMOUR BUST

Born Halstead, Essex, 1841.

PLEASANT TITTY

Baptised Margate, Kent, 1768.

(She was named after her mum — so the family had a pair of Pleasant Tittys.)

SEXEY BUTT

Born Dundry, Somerset, 1803.

EFFING DICK

Born Glasgow, 1848.

WILLY MUSCLE

Born Holme, Huntingdonshire, 1685.

GOLDEN BALLS

Baptised Aylsham, Norfolk, 1813.

KENNETH McSHAGGER

Born Scotland, 1841.

WILLIE STRETCH

Born Winsford, Cheshire, 1894.

NANCY BOYS

Born Brighton, 1842.

MAD LOONEY

Died Warwicks, 1894.

CONSTANT PAIN

Born Hackney, London, 1901.

MINNIE BAR

Baptised Galston, Ayr, 1761.

AL DENTE

Born Whitechapel, London, 1900.

POSTHUMOUS MINCE

Died Greenwich, Kent, 1839.

AGNES ETTA PEPPER

Born Ipswich, 1881.

EASTER BUNNY

Born Yorkshire, 1851.

KITTY LITTER

Born Marston, Cheshire, 1839.

HOLLY BERRY

Born Barnsley, 1880.

PEARLY GATES

Married Westminster, 1996.

RICK O’SHEA

Married Kennington, London, 1864.

SENSITIVE REDHEAD

Born Bridlington, E Yorks, 1873.

JIMMY RIDDLE

Born Melrose, Midlothian, 1648

PETE SAKE

Born Cheshire, 1840.

PECULIAR BUTTERY

Married Wolverhampton, 1871.

ALICE MAY FALL

Born Shoreditch, London, 1894.

NICHOLAS STREAKER

Born Durham, 1747.

LETTICE SPRAY

Baptised Greasley, Notts, 1633.

IRIS TEW

Died Chester, 1985.

DICK BRAIN

Born Stoke-on-Trent, 1871.

TURD COLLAR

Born Ireland, 1821.

TERESA FARTWANGLER

Born Usk, Monmouth, 1828.

PHILIP PLONKER

Baptised Shalford, Surrey, 1632.

WILLY LEAK

Born Poplar, London, 1886.

ANICE BOTTOM

Baptised Dewsbury, W Yorks, 1837.

IVA LONGBOTTOM

Born Balby, S Yorks, 1899.

TRANNIE PICKUP

Born Portsmouth, 1853.

SILLY TROLLOPE

Born Doncaster, 1894.

DICK HANDLER

Baptised Earls Colne, Essex, 1585.

JOYCE MOODY NUTTER

Died Braintree, Essex, 2001.

HUGH SWELLING

Born Ireland, 1811.

PHIL GRAVES

Died Rotherham 1879.

DEMOSTHENES CUPPA

Married London, 1886.

BASIL LEAF

Born York, 1895.

LARGE BEE

Born Notts, 1829.

LOW FEE

Married Chorlton, Cheshire, 1908.

COLLY FLOWER

Father of girl married in Soho, London, 1797.

MAUD STALE BUN

Born Sunderland, 1851.

LOW FAT

Married Cardiff, 1905.

FAY KING

Died Bromley, Kent, 1998.

SANDY BEACH

Born East London, 1899.

DAILY BONER

Born Hernhill, Kent, 1898.

Taken from Potty, Fartwell & Knob, compiled by Russell Ash, Headline £6.99.

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